How to do Social Selling the Right Way with Authentic Conversations


Having a solid social selling strategy can truly help your business.

I know firsthand because I get brought into 7-figure teams to help train their teams in this department. And I’ve been a part of some pretty big launches. Being good at sales and nurturing leads is always the difference maker in successful online businesses.

I’m Michelle Terpstra, a former sales leader for Fortune 500 companies. I left the corporate world to be home with my kids and now I’m a sales coach and offer strategist to help service providers, coaches and consultants master selling without the ease or sleaze and create authentic selling systems.

*My blog may contain affiliate links for recommended tools and products, where I could earn a small commission if you purchase. Check out my full list of recommended tools here. Thanks in advance.

What is Social Selling?

It’s a newish term. Social selling is the act of selling on social media platforms, like:

  • LinkedIn
  • Instagram
  • Facebook
  • TikTok
  • YouTube

These are all of the platforms where you have the opportunity to have a communication with your ideal clients and convert those leads those audience members, and community members into paying clients.

Yes, you can spend a small fortune trying to convert a cold audience with Facebook Ads. But you might as well tap into the FREE platforms you’re already active on and where your next dream clients are hanging out right?

Technically, social selling is a lead generation and sales technique where salespeople directly interact with their prospects on media platforms to convert them into customers. These interactions mostly take place inside DM/Messenger.

As organic social media selling strategies are becoming more and more important each and every day for course creators, coaches, service-based entrepreneurs to convert leads into paying clients there is high demand for REAL people not BOTS to humanize the sales process via social selling. 

People are getting smart.

We know when bots are doing the work. We also respond to real human interaction, connection, and invitations. Social selling is a way to bring people into our clients world on a one-to-one grassroots level.

Side Note: DM = Direct Message on Instagram; Message on Messenger = Facebook


What gives Social Selling a bad rap?

Unfortunately, there is sometimes a bad rap regarding social selling. You may have gotten some pretty lousy outreach messages that just make you want to NEVER be that person.

These bad DMs feel slimy and sleazy. You don’t fall for it. You can tell when someone is using you for a sale.

Cold, salesy outreach messages can quickly fill up our DMs:

Maybe like this one what that makes assumptions about you. (the nerve!)

Or this one where you know the sale is going to be the very next question. (here it comes….)

That’s because this is social selling gone wrong.

And my goal here in this blog is to teach you the RIGHT WAY.


How to do Social Selling the RIGHT way



Pop your air pods in and listen to this 9-minute video if you’re more of a visual learner or listener. And while you’re there, would you please subscribe to my Sales for Breakfast YouTube Channel so you don’t miss future releases.


The Empowered Yes Formula ™

The reason why I love the Empowered Yes Formula and why I teach it for both my discovery calls and my Social Selling is because I believe that when you say yes to working with someone, it needs to be an empowered yes.

Especially if we’re talking about a premium service with a coach, consultant or service provider.

This is called permissive sales, where both people are super excited and mutually decide on working together.

There’s no regrets. Buyer’s remorse.

It’s super clear what’s going to happen when you work together. You’ll have a beautiful relationship and time together. And you’re going to achieve results.

Forceful, pushy, manipulation … NONE of that does not need to be used.


Bad things happen when you’re pushy

Those bad, slimy sales tactics do work and get people to say YES when they don’t really mean it or want it.

But this is bad for business.

Instead of creating loyal raving fans… post working-together, you get people on Reddit saying that you lied to them, or you pushed them or you manipulated them, or they don’t give you a testimonial, or all of these bad things happening.

And so it is really, really important that we aim for an Empowered YES.

Again, this is permissive sales, where both parties agree and the results are amazing.



Authentic Social Selling

Social Selling is actually a great strategy to be using in the next virtual live launch of your high-ticket group coaching program or course. And I’ve created a checklist for you so you can start social selling in your pre-launch. Click here to get it.


Afraid to Look Spammy

I have noticed the reason why online business owners, who have social media presence, don’t do social selling is because getting into DM is just really uncomfortable.

People aren’t gonna like it!

They’re gonna think I’m spammy!


Create a Safe and Fun DM Vibe for Your Brand

So it’s really important that your brand and the way that you connect with people creates a safe and fun DM vibe.

That means you need to give reasons for you to connect with people in DM.

So instead of out-of-the-blue, salesy messages, like “Oh, hey, you What’s up? Wanna buy this?” you actually have a legit reason to connect in the DM.

Your new vibe is: It’s ok to DM me, I want to DM you and I want to message you. I am NOT a Spammy Sammy.


So examples of this:

In a post or video, say: “Hey, if this interests you, like, send me a DM with like this word _____ and I would love to help you.”

This will drive traffic to your DM and people will know it’s going to be safe and fun to talk to you.


This works for 7-figure teams too

If you’re a 7-figure CEO, or a multi-six-figure CEO, you can totally have your team help you with this social selling strategy. It works for the solopreneur all the way up to 7-figure CEOs. (I even heard 8-figure CEO Amy Porterfield talking about this on a recent podcast how she incorporated this into her recent launch)

Creating a safe and fun DM is really important.

So if you’re in the CEO role, it’s important that one of your brand values be: that you love your people so much that you talk to them and DM and messenger

You need to get off that guru stage, can come back down to interacting with your leads in the DM. Beautiful things will happen for your business. Even if your sales team is helping you….

And solopreneurs? You need to be in the DMS all the time relating and building relationships.


Beautiful things happen when your DMs are a fun place to hang out – no matter what stage of business you’re in!


How to Get Excited about DMs

If the above advice doesn’t release you of your DMing fears, then this next trick will totally get you excited about connecting with your prospects on social.

This is my tactic: I will give a bit-sized tip, trick, hack or something of value and say, “Hey, if you want more information, I’ll send it to you in Messenger or DM”

BOOM – I add value inside the DM.

So I’m giving them additional information privately for them to use and apply to their business. And it also starts a really authentic sales conversation.

It’s very natural and easy to do.


(PS – Wanna check out my own added DM value? Send me a DM on Instagram with the words “launch activities” and I’ll send over my checklist!)


The Fastest Way to Kill a DM Conversation

The fastest way to kill a potentially amazing sales conversation in the DM is to respond with a period at the end.

Statements kill deals, questions keep people going.

Statements kill deals. Questions keep people going.

– Michelle Terpstra

So remember, when you’re going back and forth with someone either voice memo or typed-out message, be sure that it ends in a question mark. This is an anchor so that they want to come back to respond and continue the conversation with you.

Now this might seem a little bit uncomfortable for you if you’re not used to social selling, or perhaps you’re super excited right now because all these ideas have come to mind about how you can integrate social selling into your business.

Now the cool thing is, social selling works so well for Facebook group funnels, Instagram sales funnels, freebie funnels, and virtual live events.



This is why I teach my clients in the Sales Success Lab to “Always be Curious.” It will get you asking open-ended questions.


Social Selling Super Charges your Live Launch Events + Funnels

My clients who use authentic social selling can see up to a 50% conversion rate and their virtual live events. Pretty amazing!

Just think what that added revenue could do for your business?

How many more people could you positively impact if they worked with you?

Social selling is the needed layer right now when you’re launching your group coaching programs or courses.

It’s a noisy, busy, over-marketed-to world, and what people crave most is human connection.

There are so many different ways that you can add a layer of social selling into your business that will be incredibly powerful for sales conversion. So I really really encourage you to feel lit up by the opportunity to have those types of intimate conversations with your community, your leads and your audience.

Now if you’re excited to jump out there right now and do some social selling, let me know in the comments below.

We can keep this conversation going over in my Facebook Group: Hello to Closed: High-Performance Strategies for Entrepreneurs

And be sure to grab my live launch checklist with 4 key social selling activities: Click here to get it.


Until next time, friends, happy selling

Michelle Terpstra


👋Let’s Connect on your Fave Social:

Instagram: @themichelleterpstra

TikTok: @themichelleterpstra

Facebook: @themichelleterpstra

YouTube: Sales for Breakfast with Michelle Terpstra




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